Peggy's Commentary - April 14, 2010
Updated April 28, 2010
Update: April 28, 2010:
Sandra Bullock has now revealed that she has adopted an African American infant boy from New Orleans. Her role in "Blindside" (where she played the role of a Southern white woman who adopted an African American teenage boy) obviously had a strong impact on her real life.
She and Jesse received the child three months ago, but decided to keep the adoption secret until after the Oscar experience ended and the adoption process was completed. But the revelation of Jesse's affairs happened before they went public with news of the child. Now, as she files for divorce, the final adoption is as a single parent. It appears that she is ecstatic about this baby boy. So her pain about what happened in her marriage seems to be mitigated by the joy she feels about this child.
I had originally pointed out how "life imitates art" (below) in that she played a role in a movie where her husband had an affair before this happened to her in real life. Once again this has happened in that she played a role in a movie where the woman adopted an African American child; then she did the same in real life. But this time it's a positive imitation of art rather than a negative one. So we can only wish her the best - as we wait to see what roles she chooses to play in the future!
Below is the original posting on April 14, 2010:
Most of us have been hoping for the best for Sandra Bullock in getting through the ordeal of her husband's (Jesse James) affairs. Based on her expressions of love for him and other glowing comments she made about him on recent awards shows, she obviously thought he was totally committed to heronly to be blindsided by the facts of his secret life of affairs.
Like almost everyone in this position, she seemed to be shocked and devastated by this newsand has been wisely protecting herself from the media onslaught. We can only hope that she's taking care of herself and recovering in the best way possibleand that she will be able to make good decisions as she continues to deal with this whole situation.
Her decisions at every step of this process need to be whatever SHE thinks best, not whatever other people have to say as to what she "should" do. As I have repeatedly pointed out, we need to accept and respect any person's decision as to how to handle this kind of situationregardless of whether we agree or understand it.
There are many facts about Sandra's situation that make it all the more difficult:
In 1998, she starred in a movie called "Hope Floats" in which she played a woman who is devastated by her husband's affair and his decision to leave her and their daughter for the other woman. It even included a 'public-airing' of the situation that is somewhat similar to what happened in real lifewith so much public attention and public scrutiny.
In the movie, the opening scene shows Sandra's character appearing on a TV show with her best friend. She thinks it's some kind of surprise, but is devastated when she learns that the surprise is her best friend's announcement that she's having an affair with the husband of Sandra's character. To add insult to injury, then the husband comes on the show as well to confirm this and to say he's leaving her to marry her best friend.
Of course, part of my interest in the movie was because of the subject of affairs, but like so many people, I find Sandra Bullock an appealing character, regardless of the particular role she's playing. In fact, I saw the movie at the time it was released, and I've watched it several additional times through the years. I also have a CD of the sound track of the moviewhich I listen to quite often.
In the movie, she escaped back to her hometown with her daughter to stay with her mother. She convincingly acted the part of a devastated wife who couldn't eat or function for quite awhile. While we don't know precisely how Sandra has been coping, we do know that she has tried to escape from the spotlight while she determines how to pick up the pieces and go on. (Of course, the movie has a typical Hollywood ending, where she eventually finds love again when she opens up to a home-town man from her youth.)
So until we know how Sandra's future will unfold, we can get a glimpse of the way she struggled and succeeded in this fictional story, thereby reminding ourselves of why we love her: for her pure likeability as well as her exceptional acting skills.